Bookish Thoughts: We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver

November 8, 2000

Dear Franklin, 

I'm unsure why one trifling incident this afternoon has moved me to write to you.  But since we've been separated, I may most miss coming home to deliver the narrative curiosities of my day, the way a cat might lay mice at your feet: the small, humbling offerings that couples proffer after foraging in separate backyards.  Were you still installed in my kitchen, slathering crunchy peanut butter on Branola though it was almost time for dinner, I'd no sooner have to put down the bags, one leaking a clear viscous drool, than this little story would come tumbling out, even before I chided that we're having pasta tonight so would you please not eat that whole sandwich.

~ Opening of We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver

We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver (narrated by Coleen Marlo)

Harper Audio, 2011

Fiction; 16 hours, 9 minutes

From the Publisher:

Eva never really wanted to be a mother - and certainly not the mother of a boy who ends up murdering seven of his fellow high school students, a cafeteria worker, and a much-adored teacher who tried to befriend him, all two days before his 16th birthday. Now, two years later, it is time for her to come to terms with marriage, career, family, parenthood, and Kevin's horrific rampage, in a series of startlingly direct correspondences with her estranged husband, Franklin. Uneasy with the sacrifices and social demotion of motherhood from the start, Eva fears that her alarming dislike for her own son may be responsible for driving him so nihilistically off the rails.

After listening to William Landy's Defending Jacob  and reading Jodi Picoult's Nineteen Minutes, I hoped I would get to Lionel Shriver's We Need to Talk About Kevin before the end of the year.  When a couple of ladies in one of my online reading groups mentioned doing a group read of the book, I jumped at the opportunity.  Unfortunately, it didn't turn out to be much of a group read. Only one other person read the book, and she read it much quicker than I did.  By the time I finished, she had moved on to other things.

We Need to Talk About Kevin is not only a well written book that makes one think, it is also a book that draws the reader in affects him or her (at least me) on a more visceral level.  This is a book that is an experience rather than just another book to be read.  

Because of all the emotions and thoughts the book was dredging up, I thought it would be interesting to keep a journal as I read.  Although I have tried to keep this as spoiler free as possible, it may be that some have slipped in.  Please read with caution.  These are some of my initial thoughts:

When reading a book, it isn't unusual for me to draw comparisons between my life and that of the characters I am reading about.  I not only ask what I would do in a similar or the same situation, but I also think of how similar or dissimilar I think or behave from the characters I am reading about.  It's not something I put much effort into; rather, it's just the type of reader I am.  Call it reflection, internalization, personalization or what have you.  It's both a blessing and a curse.  Especially when I read a book like this. Being still newish to parenting and one who recently suffered from Postpartum Depression, I'm most susceptible to anything related to parenting and parenting issues. 

Anyway, listening to We Need to Talk About Kevin, particularly the very early letters, I found myself wondering about my own reasons to have a child.  My own ambiguity about having a child before my husband and I decided we wanted a child.  Eva and I were in totally different places when we got pregnant though.  Her situation just makes me sad. Not wanting a child, but having one because she thinks it will make her husband happy. 

and about half way through:

I feel sorry for Eva mostly.  I think she did what she could with what she knew.  She tried.  But I also am getting the distinct impression that she never really wanted Kevin even after he was born.  He was a very difficult child.  Colicky, perhaps?  How much of Eva's observations of Kevin as a young child are to be believed?  Is she a reliable narrator? What I see is the lack of attachment between a child and his mother--and even the father.  As much as Eva says Franklin is on Kevin's side, Franklin was always absent early on and his denial and belief that his son was an ideal and not the reality, did not help.

I am not blaming Eva or Franklin for what Kevin did, but I do think, from a clinical standpoint, something didn't click for Kevin during those early, vital formative years.  Maybe even before that really.  I believe a baby, even from the womb, can sense certain things.  So I tend to think his mother and father's detachment were contributing factors.  But I think he was already "off" somehow when he was born.

and finally,

I really liked the book.  I can't say I was surprised by how things unfolded as I had a strong sense how everything would play out from the beginning.  Still, I loved the author's writing and the way she really brought out the characters, especially Eva. Reading her story brought to mind William Landay's Defending Jacob.  It's from a father's perspective of a son who is accused of murdering a classmate.  It's less "in the head" as compared to Shriver's book--more a thriller, I think, than Shriver's book, which I see more as literary fiction.

The book was much easier for me to read after the first half, I'll admit.  Once I was able to get out of my own head and just focus on Eva's situation.  

This book is certainly thought provoking.  The idea of nurture versus nature comes to mind.  And I especially like the fact that it is written from the perspective of a parent.  All too often we, as a society, are quick to blame the parents when a child acts out like Kevin did.  I think it's a natural process in our attempt to understand the "why" of it.  Eva wasn't a character I particularly liked, and I doubt we ever would have been friends had she been real and we met in real life, but I felt for her as a parent and as a woman.  I understand Eva's feelings of guilt.  I think in her shoes, I would feel the same way. It's easy to look back and think of all that should have been done, the interventions that might have helped prevent such a horrible act from occurring.  And it's easy to think--or say--we would do things differently in the same situation.   I came away from this book shaking my head. I really don't know.  It's a book that makes me sad mostly.  Sad for Eva. Sad for all those families who lost loved ones.  As for Kevin, I have no sympathy for him.  Maybe for that little boy he once was, but what he did was plain evil.

Coleen Marlo narrated the audio production of the book and I have to say I have a hard time separating her from the story, given how much her voice became and was Eva for me.  She did an amazing job.  Thanks to her and the author, We Need to Talk About Kevin is a book I won't soon forget.

Rating:  (Outstanding)

You can learn more about Lionel Shriver and her books on the author's Facebook Page. 
For more information about the narrator, Coleen Marlo, visit her blog.

Source: I bought an audio copy of this book for my own listening pleasure.

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© 2013, Wendy Runyon of Musings of a Bookish Kitty. All Rights Reserved. If you're reading this on a site other than Musings of a Bookish Kitty or Wendy's feed, be aware that this post has been stolen and is used without permission.